Tomorrow is the big day. The more I tell myself not to think about it, I'm thinking about it. It's not going to be the end of me tho. I mean whatever grade I might get, I could eventually overcome it by passing the varsity test-the ticket to my desired road. So, I shouldn't actually get distracted by the result tomorrow even if I do well. This will not be the end of me like I said, there are many more exams to attend and results to receive in life and so this is just the beginning.
I guess I'm worried about disappointing my parents. I don't have much expectations, I know I can handle a bad grade or so. But the tension arises, when I have to face my parents. They have a group of families to tell my result to. And if I don't get an A+, they'd be ashamed in front of them all because of me. And I never want to deprive them of their comfort, their pride, their statuses. This is the scary part, I have no control over my results now, I did what I could in the exams and the results have already been checked and double checked so all we're left to do is to wait and see it unfolding in front of us tomorrow.
I'm missing Api. Today, when I put on her old slippers(That she no more uses) before leaving for coaching, I felt her beside me. As if she was telling me everything will turn out okay, I don't have to worry so much. It was good having her last time, when the ssc results came out you know. I was terrified the night before. She comforted me, like she always does, when I'm in a situation like this. She would say- "Been there done that!
Ask me. When I was your age,I used to have these vivid dreams about failing board exam. Happens. It's a world shared fear, and good students always underestimate themselves...You will get A+ puchi, this I know."
I at least had a support-system in the house if something went wrong.
She's in a different house now and It doesn't feel the same. I'm missing her so much. How am I going to sleep tonight? It's nerve-wrecking! Tomorrow is the result of the final board-test! God knows if I have passed even?!
I guess I'm worried about disappointing my parents. I don't have much expectations, I know I can handle a bad grade or so. But the tension arises, when I have to face my parents. They have a group of families to tell my result to. And if I don't get an A+, they'd be ashamed in front of them all because of me. And I never want to deprive them of their comfort, their pride, their statuses. This is the scary part, I have no control over my results now, I did what I could in the exams and the results have already been checked and double checked so all we're left to do is to wait and see it unfolding in front of us tomorrow.
I'm missing Api. Today, when I put on her old slippers(That she no more uses) before leaving for coaching, I felt her beside me. As if she was telling me everything will turn out okay, I don't have to worry so much. It was good having her last time, when the ssc results came out you know. I was terrified the night before. She comforted me, like she always does, when I'm in a situation like this. She would say- "Been there done that!
Ask me. When I was your age,I used to have these vivid dreams about failing board exam. Happens. It's a world shared fear, and good students always underestimate themselves...You will get A+ puchi, this I know."
I at least had a support-system in the house if something went wrong.
She's in a different house now and It doesn't feel the same. I'm missing her so much. How am I going to sleep tonight? It's nerve-wrecking! Tomorrow is the result of the final board-test! God knows if I have passed even?!
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