Everly

Spread the hate! So there’s some girls in my class, whom I can’t stand. I might behave really “sweet” to them, but trust me, inside I burn! I wish I could just kill them with my bare hands. Don’t worry, it’s all in my head.   Methilda. (I hate her. She’s Ms. Know it all. And such a show off. But Ann kind of worships her. Figures. ) Easy, girl! I get that you’re a genius, I have no problem with that. But I’m completely disgusted by your taste. I mean, okay you’re all over Bennedict and probably one of his crazy stalkers, but we don’t need your updates, bitch! Not everyone like that weirdo. Stop flooding my newsfeed with your shit. Ugh. Mysha Annava I just hate this girl to the infinity. She’s such a drama queen and attention seeker. Always makes fuss out of the simplest matters. The main reason I can’t hate her enough is that she tries to seduce my stat. sir. Yeah, bitch. Like he’s going to fall for your vuri. You don’t have a muffin top sweetheart, you’ve g...

Confession#23 29 th August, 2014 My grandpa died on this date a year ago. I was in college when he passed away. He was feeling sick in the morning that day, and I was leaving for my college. My instincts were telling me that it could be bad news. But I didn’t miss my college for him. Neither my parents told me to do so. So I missed seeing him in his death bed. I last saw him maybe on eid the previous year. He gave me salami. I could remember his old wrinkled smile. His eyes used to sparkle. And I can see how lonely he used to be without dadu. I wasn’t there when he took his last breath. In fact I was barely there the time he was alive. I’m a bad grand-daughter. Really bad. I hardly went down his apartment to see him. I didn’t take care of him. He was there, just one floor beneath us, he was there the whole time. But I didn’t bother to just say hi or ask him about his health. And I chose not to see him at his vulnerable state. Not because I care. But because he ba...

Confession# 21 I’m no good at cooking, I mean I make omelets okay, can boil eggs or what say…pretty much everything. I can cook instant noodles with real passion. I can make tea, coffee. Yeah, that’s pretty much it. I have a thing for ingredients though. I hardly recognize them. Especially veggies. I find most of them look alike. I can’t differentiate potatoes from gingers. They look kind of the same! Cucumbers and Potol. Carrot and Mula.   Dhonepata looks like pudina pata to me. All this time I thought they’re same, their fragments are same so can you blame me? I was making noodles few weeks back and found some leafs in the fridge, I wasn’t sure what it was until then I asked bua, she told me it was pudinapata. She might be illiterate but at some point I’m dumber than her. Cooking is chemistry. And I suck at chemistry. Big time! Confession# 22 When I saw him today in his off white Panjabi, I couldn’t help but stare at him. He’s so…crushable, and he might be ov...

So I was chatting with my friend Ann. We were talking about Jamie Dornan, newest celeb crush, who’s been the leading actor- Christian Grey;   on Fifty Shades of Grey movie.   Okay so Ann uploaded a photo of him, very cute looking. And it appeared on my newsfeed. My mom was passing by the pc and her eyes stuck on the screen, at his photo. I assumed she was observing my newsfeed and I peeked at her and she narrow-eyed me! Obviously, I could read her mind. And I was like- I wish he were my boyfriend, Ma! Nothing I’d ever want so bad. My ammu is impossible. She thinks I flirt with foreigners through the internet. I set Dean’s wallpaper on my phone, so one day it appeared before her and she was like- “Who’s that guy on your mobile?!” Areh. Do you seriously think that a girl like me could ever get a guy like that? And for god’s sake, will you stop suspecting them as my boyfriends? They are celebs, Ma. She’s a real pain in the ass at times you know. So I had this Robi te...

Confession #18 I’ve been busy. Tired mostly. I don’t know what happened to me these days.   And I have so much to confess. I don’t know if I could make it. I’m feverish. And I feel like I’m gonna throw up anytime. My apatite changed. And I have stat exam tomorrow. But I didn’t study a thing. Yesterday I fell asleep in stat class, and sir called me up. I woke up and he asked me if I was okay, If I had fever, If I was having a headache. In reply to his odd queries, I just shook my head three times. Yeah, it was awkward. But he didn’t scold me or anything, he then continued the class on track. And I got into thinking- I was fully okay, I didn’t have a fever, no not that time, my head wasn’t aching. I was deeply asleep in his class which I said it indirectly by shaking my head three times. “Yes, your class is boring!”   Gosh! I should’ve said that I wasn’t okay, that I was having some kind of headache. I would’ve even got some sympathy from him then. And he wouldn’t...

Confession #16 I’ve been busy reading this erotica. It was…I lost my words for it. I’m on the page 151. I couldn’t believe my eyes what I was reading. A book can be that much dirty!?   But I don’t know some parts of it were lovable, sweet and fun. But some were WILD. FREAKINGLY WILD. Ann already finished up and she said the ending is disappointing. I wasn’t actually hoping for a happy ending though. Because whatever Mr. Grey and Anastasia were doing couldn’t end well. Confession #17 I hate the Bangali customs about marriage. I profoundly hate it! I don’t wanna get married here. Hell no. Marry me off to some foreigner in a foreign land please!? I like Spanish guys. Although my mother says she won’t marry me off to someone. She wants me to stay with her for the eternity I guess. Areh. She’s just emotional about api leaving the house.

Ann and I, we started reading Fifty Shades of Grey. It’s an erotica!! I’m on the 3 rd chapter and she’s on 9 th . Not that I’m a slow reader, I started from just few hours ago and she from the last night. Nothing erotic happens so far I’m reading. But she says on page 80 something they already “did” it! And it’s pretty cool.   

“Sometimes, you read a book and it fills you with this weird evangelical zeal, and you become convinced that the shattered world will never be put back together unless and until all living humans read the book…(Then again) Books so special and rare and yours that advertising your affection feels like a betrayal.”   The fault in our stars, John Green. When I read Khaled Hosseini’s A Thousand Splendid Suns, I realized; John Green said the exact true words. I was convinced actually, telling everyone I know to read this incredible book that I just finished and I was literally detached from the universe, was utterly lost in the story that Khaled Hosseini created. I’ve never been so touched by anything regarding books or sad movies. I never really shed tears reading books. But this one made me cry. Tears rolled down my eyes. I cried for the characters of the book- Mariam and Laila whom are fictional, non-existents. I hadn’t even cried that much in my grandma’s funeral. But I cr...

Confession #11 I hate when our basher BUA starts talking, she’s a chatterbox and doesn’t care whether people are listening or not, she goes on and on, really a distraction. You know what she’s doing right now? Telling her life story to Api, I turned the music out loud, but it seems that, she’s louder. Confession #12 You won’t believe what just happened in the college today! My guardian being called. Care to know the stupid thing I’ve done to get accused for? Read further. L So I was late as usual. Pretty much late. I left home having just five min. in my hand, so reaching up on time was quite impossible. But I was very optimistic on my way. I hoped for everyone to be late. I also hoped for a miracle to happen, to get me in the class on time. But no miracles happened. I reached there, 20 min. late, had to do the class standing outside. Also, I was marked absent. It didn’t bother me much. It’s kind of my everyday story. I bunked stat. class few weeks ago. FYI,...

Confession #10 I thought, true love existed. I thought, it’s an amazing feeling, like a drug. That it has a habit of coming back. That nobody can ditch this sort of feeling.   A splendid feeling. Which I had not felt yet. But you know what? I always fancied what would it be like to fall in love. How awesome would it be if I had a boyfriend. How cheesy would it be to get waken up by morning texts. Goodnight texts. Kisses. Hugs. Dates. Okay, not so sure about kisses. But I wouldn’t mind hugging. It’s always been just a fantasy.  To be honest, I don’t blend in with everyone. I don’t talk to everyone. I am selective and at times a critic. I never talked to boys, you know “flesh and blood”, other than just brothers or cousins’ type a boys. I never really speak to them unless I’m spoken to. It feels awfully awkward   to even making eye contact with them. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, Am I extremely boy shy? Maybe. I get nervous around cute and handsome ones....

Confession #9 They call me a horny bitch. There should be a reason behind this (Wanting to sleep with Jensen Ackles is an honest obsession, not a horny feeling). And if you’re reading this confession 9 you’d probably find out why.  So I’m gonna confess all about the things I had learned through porn’s, movies, wikis and also youtube videos. Korean porns, karma sutra. Have you ever really imagined what’s behind this innocent little face? To clear the misconceptions, may I first tell you what it’s like to be a teenager with raising hormones.   Sex education being a forbidden knowledge. Mother-daughter no sex talk. Embarrassments while kissing scenes came on TV but the remote’s not working and tolerating the bad comments made by parents. Dumping the curiosity. Loneliness and influence of the friends crowd. How it’s like to be the person with zero knowledge about sex. No scope for knowing how this natural thing works. So internet, yeah that helped knowing at least a bri...

I don’t know if it counts as a confession this one, my friends already know about it. So I was in the college, first year and one of my eyelashes fell off. And my friends were like “Wish, wish, wish!” Then I murmured and poof the lash in the air. They asked what I wished for. In my exact words: “I wished to sleep with Dean(Jensen Ackles) .” And they were all like “What?!” They still bully me because of it. They call me a horny bitch.

Confession #6 I have a friend named Shila, we’re friends for like 9 years now. Not a strong friendship though. You know you can’t just measure a friendship by its time. But we’re good friends. I know her FB password. And often, I sneak into her profile, read all the private messages. She’s such a perv and boy crazy! But she doesn’t know that I log into her profile, not even she changes her password, perhaps she doesn’t know how to change it. I left my glasses in the coaching one day. That place was a stone’s throw from her house. So I called her and told her to bring back my glasses as I was already home and to keep it with her so that I could get it the very next day. I was feeling awful without it. But she just wouldn’t. I got mad at her, I told her I couldn’t see anything and she was like “Why should I bother?” I got mad and put down my phone. Then the thought of revenge struck into my head. I logged into her profile, gave like to “Porn’s tube” a page full of porn which s...

Confession #4 When I was like 5 or 6, I couldn’t stand my grandma(Father’s side). My grandma couldn’t stand me either. So the hatred was mutual. There were many reasons, priorities and superstitions for which   we didn’t like each other. We never bonded. And I always felt like, she would accept me someday like her other grandchildren, but she didn’t. She treated me like shit. And all I could do was pretend that I love her. But I waited for the day when she would really, truly love me and I would really truly love her, trust me I waited. But the day never came. She died 6 years ago. So I always feel, some things got left unsaid. We have some unfinished business to take care of-My grandma and I. And I’m looking forward to the day, when I’d meet her. Ask her why she didn’t love me. Why she didn’t at least pretend to love me? Why she didn’t accept me? Why she always underestimated me? I’ll ask all the questions that still, at times eat me alive. --- So last night was intere...

I failed at I.C.T (computer science) on my 1 st year final. I got 5 out of 50. There shows 10 out of 100 on my report card.

I've never really watched the Titanic movie in my life, though I'm a 90s kid. I just watched the sinking scene once which made me cry and I thought I know the ending of it, so I can lie to people and pretend like I watched the whole shit.

So I’ve been messing with Ask fm, a site that allows you to ask anything to anyone online. You also can hide your name. So obviously I’ve been using it as anon, I don’t wanna get into any trouble. So this guy named Promito Pronjoy, who has a girlfriend for like 11 months now. Her name is Raba, you know how English medium girls are like, right? Okay, so I asked her boyfriend two questions, all flirty. And today I got the reply of the second question I asked him. Let’s start with the first one: I asked : hi.You are so cute.Do you know how to french kiss? if not,I'll teach you :* He replied: when can i start my classes ;) So I kind of flirted back, hehe :   Anytime,Love! :***** But I envy Raba.she's one lucky fucker! Youre my man crush everyday. <3 And he said: hahahahhaha.... i am flattered, this was sweet :) He’d be the first man who got flattered by me. I mean obviously not by my real self. Anon self. But hey, I’m not serious, just up for so...

My sister is soon to get married and leave the house, so I probably should find someone to confess all the things that creeps my head out at night. So this segment is all about my confessions. Dirty secrets. Okay whatever you call it. Secrets that I haven’t or won’t tell anyone but here. Each confession would carry a hashtag and a number maintaining the sequence. What are we waiting for? Let’s get started :)

Let’s see. How was my day. It was pretty much like the other ones. All boring and sleepy. College days. Always have something to do with sleeping on desk and daydreaming while the lectures are on. The weather was really hot and sweaty the day. But now it’s drizzling. I was reading some book with short stories, various English writers during the class periods. And there was a story named “Big blonde” all about some stupid blondes having mid-life crisis. And there was this lady called Mrs. Morse who   attempted suicide of no big reason. She was hardly sober the day, and swallowed a bunch of tablets, to make peace with herself. I couldn’t get any sense out of it. I borrowed the book from the college library, which I regret now. No good stories in it. I chose it with so much expectations, I bunked a whole class to find something readable. Now that I found it, it bored me already. My brother’s also reading this book of short stories, no offense to the English authors of thi...

Ann. I got friends with her when we were in class nine. I actually met her a year before that. The time I got into her school. No one wanted to be friends with me, the reasons being – a) I was a new comer and not even a good student b) Anti-social c) not much of a pretty face nor a gossip queen d) didn’t have a Facebook account. So, It was pretty much a disastrous year for me. Ankan and I knew each other. Ann was in her friends’ crowd. And when we got in class 9, everyone got separated into three different groups based on science, commerce and arts. We three got in the commerce group. Therefore, they lost their friends going in other schools and subjects, and I on the other hand, had no particular ones. That’s when we became friends and stick for like 3 years now. Ann went USA this year in June. Ann and I, we are like the opposite sides of a globe. Even now, that she’s like what, thousands miles away, we argue in our chats. And she never takes a break from Hollywood gossip, you ...

Time heals pain. It does not heal the scars, the memories, the left outs. It can only shorten some heartaches, but not the feelings you once felt, the moments that you once cherished. I thought when my sis would leave; I'd cry couple of weeks for her,frequently miss her.And then maybe, after months living apart we'd be fine,we'd be moving on with our lives.Cry less.Feel less.That's how it seemed to me at first.But it's not like that at all. I cannot just cry a river and get over her just like that. I can't forget all those moments I shared with her.Not even in a thousand weeks.Because those moments,they're unforgettable,it's like they're all sealed to my heart.She's been sealed to my heart.  The only best friend I have in my life is Api. I'd caught her secret laughs every freaking time.It's me who knows all the reasons to the tears she shed. Her secrets.Weirdness level.Her most imperfect ways. I know every little thing about her. I...