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Currently kind of overwhelmed by the varsity stuff. Had orientation just 3 days ago and I already feel this week being eventful.

I don't know I am kind of stressed already. It's been hectic. Like deciding the courses, I've taken only three when I had free choice to add or change. I mean I should have taken at least 4. I don't wanna relax on my first semester and not apply for a scholarship. I want to be eligible for the scholarship from very start. Now I have to go through another hectic day to change this.

I am already so dependent on my father for this admission things. I am already in need of guidance. I just don't understand why they have to make things so complicated for the students. Why can't they just simplify this admission procedure so we don't need to bring our parents into this. I really want to make this work but I haven't made any friends there, whom I can talk and work things out. So It's just me and my dad.

Tho I have made a friend. But he's from architecture. He is in my advising group so had to force a friendship with him. I actually found him amiable among other people in my group. He was funny, made me laugh and I have to say this, he's the first boy in the history I gave my phone number to. He asked for it. And I forgot to collect his. Not to sound conceited but I just don't think it was necessary. Our departments were different. I should get friendship with someone who can be of some help you know.

I already miss my college. It was simple. I didn't have to keep a sense of sanity to make friends there.I genuinely approached people, knowing that I didn't have to behave myself. Now here, I have to keep poised, there's too many teachers, students and seniors. All talk in English, which is out of necessity I understand but. Sometimes, I crave for a moment where I can be a little insane.Be clumsy, loud, fun, less intelligent and silent. Maybe I will find moments eventually, this is just the start. I have to accept where I am right now, I have to accept that this is the point I need to grow up. I can't hold on to childish things, I have to be my own person. This is a chance to change into a grownup and be an individual. Maybe things will work out eventually. No reason to freak out now. The day after tomorrow, classes will start and I will start as well working on my life to make a big improvement.

Wish me luck!










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