It's been raining since I don't remember. The sound of it, so peaceful and the thunders just make it heavenly than it already is. I feel just so blessed that unlike the people in the street, I have a roof and a home to keep me cozy. And it's so beautiful out there for me, because at my house, in my room, I only see the beauty of it. This is to me a blessing, that in the ugliest of ugliest possibilities, God has given me somewhat luxury. And I am genuinely thankful for that to Him. He just saved me off a lot of struggle and starving and hardship via genetic lottery. Though I sometimes wish to switch lives with Charlotte, the new born princess of Cambridge, then again who doesn't wish that! Every girl wants to be a princess. I know I do.
Anyway, what I meant to say was, this isn't bad either. I love who and where I am, right here, right now. I got this one life, and no matter how I spend it, where I spend it, the years I spend it with are what matters to me. That I have both my parents now, I love them so much and I thank God everyday for them to exist in my life. When I don't think about the future, when I am completely living in the present, I feel happy and content like this, I quit being sad and I look at the blessings I have which I may not deserve, it's been given to me like a gift, like almost a miracle that I am here, my loved ones are here and I am still alive and happy. Thinking about the future stresses me, but not when I dream about it. And tell you what. I dream pretty wonderful things. Not unicorns. Seriously what do you think, I am 4?
I have my petty desires but I am not an unfinished project. I desire because I have passed those basic needs of life and now I am in hunt of self accomplishment. So dreaming and desiring aren't such a bad thing when millions of people are dying in wars,famine and deadly diseases. If those people weren't dying in wars and having a perfect normal life, they would be dreaming too. It's what we humans do. We get all stressed up and sleep for hours, deal with depressions while we're in luxury. While we stay fed and while we have this roof over our head. Being sad, isn't obvious, it's a luxury we keep, because those poor people, they're only looking for to survive and depression is a fancy word for them. Surviving? We have long passed that one now. So our needs are different, our stories too. Us unhappy doesn't have to do with wars and famine. Us happy doesn't have to do with surviving and having square meal a day. We are among the desperate people, trying to establish ourselves as individuals and so our notions take many twists and turns.
I am among those needy people who are looking for to have more out of life and who still hasn't figure out what to do with it yet. Still, STILL I'm happy because, Life doesn't have to be perfect to be wonderful.
Anyway, what I meant to say was, this isn't bad either. I love who and where I am, right here, right now. I got this one life, and no matter how I spend it, where I spend it, the years I spend it with are what matters to me. That I have both my parents now, I love them so much and I thank God everyday for them to exist in my life. When I don't think about the future, when I am completely living in the present, I feel happy and content like this, I quit being sad and I look at the blessings I have which I may not deserve, it's been given to me like a gift, like almost a miracle that I am here, my loved ones are here and I am still alive and happy. Thinking about the future stresses me, but not when I dream about it. And tell you what. I dream pretty wonderful things. Not unicorns. Seriously what do you think, I am 4?
I have my petty desires but I am not an unfinished project. I desire because I have passed those basic needs of life and now I am in hunt of self accomplishment. So dreaming and desiring aren't such a bad thing when millions of people are dying in wars,famine and deadly diseases. If those people weren't dying in wars and having a perfect normal life, they would be dreaming too. It's what we humans do. We get all stressed up and sleep for hours, deal with depressions while we're in luxury. While we stay fed and while we have this roof over our head. Being sad, isn't obvious, it's a luxury we keep, because those poor people, they're only looking for to survive and depression is a fancy word for them. Surviving? We have long passed that one now. So our needs are different, our stories too. Us unhappy doesn't have to do with wars and famine. Us happy doesn't have to do with surviving and having square meal a day. We are among the desperate people, trying to establish ourselves as individuals and so our notions take many twists and turns.
I am among those needy people who are looking for to have more out of life and who still hasn't figure out what to do with it yet. Still, STILL I'm happy because, Life doesn't have to be perfect to be wonderful.
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