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life.

So today, I just thought I should write something less depressing. Ah well at least I'm willing to try.

I woke up at noon 3 days straight. So the "skipping breakfast" routine has reversed. Then I sat on the couch for hours right after finishing my lunch. Recently. I am quite freaked over watching Grey's Anatomy. I am obsessed,what can I say. I can't get out of the show, you know what I am thinking right now?- What's gonna happen with Jackson and April's baby..! The eleventh episode is airing tonight so my eyes are on youtube. The last time I was this much freaked out on a show-was Dexter. Which ended in 8 seasons. And now I am stuck with 11 freaking seasons of Grey's Anatomy. My life.

Tomorrow is stat exam.Looking back those chapters reminded me the day when sir was hours late and I had to sit outside the coaching, on bench with a girl. She might be a science student. Because her exam was due and she had to revise. So she was reading aloud(I don't think she had time to study at home).And the topic was on human reproductive system, so I just had to sit there and hear her about sex organs and stuffs. I pretended busy glancing at my notebook but dude that was weird! How could she even think of reading those out and in front of me, and the neighbors out there. There were kids too.. It was an apartment area for god's sake. Anyway so this is how my studies going. Taking breaks, watching sneak peeks of the brand new episodes coming, and reviving awkward moments.

I don't miss her. My sister. I don't miss her the way I used to. I feel like we're growing apart, headed to different directions, and she's already got her way and I'm just sorting mine. It's not a bad thing is it? I know how selfish this sounds but I feel like it's okay. And sometimes, I consider myself lucky, to be the younger one and not the one married because I think it's the stupidest idea. Marriage. I feel like it's a waste of money, a jail. I don't think I'd ever be happy getting married. Spending the rest of your life with someone and a brand new family, and having kids, omg so scary. I am so lucky that I don't have to face it now. This is secure, what I have right now. My home is my ultimate comfort zone.  

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