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Words. It's all about words. It's all about what you speak.Not what you feel inside. So unfair you know. It gets hard sometimes. Saying what barely makes a sentence. Barely fits the hole in your heart. Sometimes, it gets so hard, to let out the thoughts you bury and simply no one cares.

It's absurd. Someday, you're gonna die. And no one will ever know what was inside your soul. What dreams or sorrow lied under your skin and bone. No one will ever know you. And you will be long gone. And you will not have any power over your stuff anymore. Things that you once used, will be a memory or sit in the back of your garage door. Your feelings, your emotions. They will disappear like you one day. And nothing you can do about it. I don't know, it just seems so....unfair to live this short and die for an eternity.

And to plan a future feels so vague sometimes. There's gonna be regrets anyway. No matter how much you succeeded you're gonna have regrets sometime in your life and you're gonna brood over it sometime. And when you're old, you won't have any dreams. You'll feel weak, ugly and alone. It's already so hard imagining it. Losing loved ones, losing youth.

The fact that I'm 19 doesn't change the fact that I will die. I may die, someday or tomorrow. Cause that's how things work in this universe. You're gifted with a life and that will be taken from you any moment. And the worst part is, no one will remember you if you were ordinary, if you were no legend. If you were shy and if you didn't say much. If you locked up your emotions and didn't let anyone in. No one will ever know you like you did, yourself.

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"Because nothing makes me happier and nothing makes me sadder than you.”

“If I had a camera," I said, "I'd take a picture of you every day. That way I'd remember how you looked every single day of your life." "I look exactly the same." "No, you don't. You're changing all the time. Every day a tiny bit. If I could, I'd keep a record of it all." "If you're so smart, how did I change today?" "You got a fraction of a millimeter taller, for one thing. Your hair grew a fraction of a millimeter longer. And your breasts grew a fraction of a—" "They did not!" "Yes, they did." "Did NOT." "Did too." "What else, you big pig?" "You got a little happier and also a little sadder." "Meaning they cancel out each other, leaving me exactly the same." "Not at all. The fact that you got a little happier today doesn't change the fact that you also become a little sadder. Every day you become a little more of both, which me...