spring is almost here

Marriage is a cage. Happily married means happily caged.  

I don't know how it works or how people are getting into this sort of thing, I just know it's not a happy term anymore when your feelings get toyed with. When you get toyed with. You want drama? Get married. You'll get a lot of them unless your husband's all sober and a grown up man.

I am not saying that from experience, I am not even married. I am just saying that because that's what I've been seeing, everyday since my sister got married. I've seen the change in her. The enslavement that took place in her beautiful mind. How she's been transforming into something he chooses for her. How she's giving up her love for things she used to love. How she's happy when he's happy. But it's not a compromise. It's a suffocation. And he causes that suffocation. And the bizarre thing is, she's damn okay about it.

When I think through her point of view, I feel sorry for her because, she has to tackle two families, hers and his. She has to make us happy, make them happy, moreover make him happy. We can wait. Because she's not living with us anymore and she thinks her in-law's have the standard to meet. And I find it completely okay. But what I am worried about is her. Her true self being lost. My sister in her being lost. Because I know her. When she loves someone, she loves like an infant. She doesn't care the upside downs. She doesn't care if that makes her vulnerable and crazy.

And because I am her sister, I worry. I judge her husband from every point of view. When her excitement gets completely shattered because of something he does, something so stupid so selfish so unmanly type. I hate to see my sis getting worried via just his phone call. He misses her when she's staying at our house, I get it. But he has to have a broad mind to at least for one moment be happy seeing his wife happy. Because my sister, she likes shopping and when she's here she does a lot of shopping and I like to see her face brighten up. Nothing could ever depress her when she's shopping, but he, he manages every time to make it painful for her. He manages to keep her worried about his stupid fever or headache or back pain. When he calls momentarily asking if she's enjoying herself when he's miserable. Is that a man would do? Is that a grown up man would do? Can't he just take care of himself one night for me and my sis to cuddle with each other and having pillow talk? No? Then I would say, he's a selfish husband. And he imprisoned my sister. YES, sadly. And I just don't know what to say or feel anymore.

None of my business, but from today's conversation with my sis, I found out that maybe she's planing to make a baby soon, this year.She didn't even wanna do it. Because last time she seemed focused to build up a career first. And now when she graduated and I think what she needs most is now a job, an internship to build up her career so that she doesn't have to be a housewife. If she's missing this internship just because her mother-in-law or husband said so, to have a baby, I have nothing to add after that. Let's make a baby, la la la. SO easy eh? I don't think she;s even ready yet. How can she be a mother when she's not ready? I seem incredibly nosy up here, but hellow? I'm her sister. It's my job to be nosy. And I don't care if it's something between a husband and a wife, but I do know that serves only their purpose not hers. To bring a baby in the house and destroy her career that's barely even started.