Everly

 you're s o bitchy and bo ss y but I love you anyway.I love that you're stupidly kind of funny.I love ho w you're such a cheese. I like it, in fact I love it w hen you appreciate me the w ay I am. s o it' s been a happy-go-lucky situation, being your baby sister and knowing that you'll al w ays stand by my side,no matter w hat.And that I can learn from your mistakes because you're such a silly-sally princess.  you know you don't have to be so cranky a s you're turning a year older today.Age i s ju st a number. Beside s, the more you'll grow, the more beautiful you'd be. I find the prettiest in you. Your chickeny leg s, that beautiful pair of eye s, and the shopping spirit of your s, I've always been jealous of the s e thing s about you.     Nobody know s you better than I do, do they? Because I know your behind the scene s storie s. I know your little big secret s. And I know that you've got a heart made of gold. If th...

she's always this clumsy. Always. you know, there were times, she could just sober up and learn from her mistakes and could get back on her feet, but she just wouldn't. She never learns from her mistakes, even making'em dozens or tons.because this is she.learning is not her thing. She is bad at pretending, predicting. She can't drive her emotions likely to her thoughts.She can't sleep because her unexpressed emotions are buried alive and those bug her all night. And she does not understand the word "extra-ordinary". is that an extension to ordinary or too much ordinary that becomes special itself? She does not fit in a crowd.S he's in the middle yet, she's outside. She's insecure of every little thing. her hair, her smile, those  not always go in a natural way. she feels insecure putting  her hair down or even smile, showing her teeth off at  times.because she knows,she has  imperfections,lot of'em and god has not sharpen her nose n...

Maa, I thought you were different. Apart from those people. But it was just a thought. Misunderstandings. We've had them. A lot of'em actually. But despite of your imperfections and everything that I might not like about you, I accepted you. Like you accepted me when I was born. when I was in your lap helpless and crying for your affection. But now, I'm not that baby anymore. I need freedom. I want privacy. I've grown. I don't tell you every little secrets that I've been holding. I keep it to myself. and I like it like that. Because You don't understand me. You just can't. It's not your fault. You are from a whole different world and we have so many differences.You didn't encourage me to be truly free. All you did was screaming at my mistakes, regretting over me. I know it's there. The love, it's still there. And it's unconditional. Because it's a mother's love.I don't question your love, trust me I don't. It's ...

I'm eighteen and I still cry like a baby. I can't stop crying and dreaming. I just can't. I cry until I get what I want. I cry because of insecurities. I cry because there's a pain in my heart. A pain, not understandable why. what do I want?  I want snow. I want to be happy again. I want to laugh. I want to breath. well not like normal in and out type of breathing. A long deep breath. An escape from the town, far far away, in the green,cold weather.I wanna breath till my lungs get all soared up. I want to sleep like a baby. Not just lying in bed thinking and regretting about the choices I've made in the past...a sound, profound, peaceful couple hours of sleep. a sleep that is unbreakable in the midway. so that I can wake up fresh,cleaned.like a new born baby. I don't know how it started.But it's not ending. All those stupid little things that causing this pain are not going away. I'm crying over little things. but trust me it hurts like crazy. I fe...

I'm gonna be 18 pretty much soon. well, the day after tomorrow. Yeah.  17 years of My life. Honestly, I've got no idea how I've been doing so far. Should I be more active and mature at this point, or get serious about life?. I don't know. Everything seems so normal. Been realizing that my life's all about sleeping,eating,eating and eating.ugh. Yesterday was my last class of the 1st year of my college. I don't know how and why( not so good at physics lol.) time passes so fast.It's been like a year I had done with my ssc and now steppin up to the 2nd year of college which is crazy. I literally freaked out yesterday.seriously? It's been a year? Soon I'll be out of the college,will be pushed into some uni and career and all that. Then what? I'll be actually living my life. I'll make my own money. how crazy is that! at this point everything seems so dumb. I'm a girl of seventeen soon to be eighteen and I've got no story. no mystery...

My friend.She's been a tease lately.And sometimes I feel  like  I don't know her anymore.What I knew about her was  she's a straight forward, Grumpy (it's in her blood),hyper,  shy(well not in front of friend's  crowd),Hollywood  freak,honest,fun but not a backstabber nor a bad influence. She's hanging out with me, all normal.But everyday after the college, when I get home, I somehow feel down and depressed observing her impressions toward me.May be because she doesn't know me yet.Unless she wouldn't do such things to hurt me or make me down. I don't feel happy- go- lucky hanging out with her anymore.I don't know why.She was such a good friend of mine.Now she's driving away and I'm letting her.May be it's for the best.I can't afford her to make me less of me. But the problem is that, I can't show off.I can't just avoid her and make her watch that.It's not me.And I have other friends too.So I can't just cut her ...

to be honest, I'm not a stereotype. But there are certain rules that I follow. I don't blend in that much. I don't have much confidence,sometimes I'm insecure, and words hit me than anything else.  I looooooove reading Marilyn Monroe quotes, I've not even watched any of her films yet,but her words inspire me like crazy. When I was a little girl, I always dreamed to live in a big house with my parents,barbie dolls, toys and wear all beautiful dresses and stuff like that.But as I was growing up, I realized that things aren't that easy.Society has it's way of shattering you and your dreams. I was never told I was pretty, whereas I saw other pretty girls treated fairly before me which was offensive.I was a girl too. I had feelings, I deserved to feel special.But everyone would judge you by your face,the clothes that you wear, and all that. Why am I so obsessed about this stupid judgements that society makes? Because I have a story behind it. It's p...