I don't have any clue what are we. Friends? Or awkward acquaintances? He talked to me today after what felt like eternity. He said, to give him time, he will come back at me. To bully me. I am not sure yet. I still have feelings left, I still am shy around him. I behave like I don't cringe when he calls me sis. I wish he hadn't called me that. It is weird. I am not that close to him. We don't speak much for god's sake. I am not even sure us being "friends" anymore. He's been mute for like a month maybe. I'd been ignoring him...Now today out of nowhere. He speaks to me again. This is weird.
Hi B, Season is changing. The hard days are almost over. The city I live in has turned so beautiful, I get overwhelmed by the beauty. Tulips are in. Cherry blossoms are blossoming. Magnolia, Beautiful white flowers, name unknown to me. Taking a walk out feels like a celebration of life. It feels like I'm falling in love with the city. I remember when I first moved here 2 years ago, the excitement and the crippling anxiety of starting a new life from scratch. Now, after 2 years, I feel a warmth and love for the place. I don't know if I would feel the same when the winter comes though. Seasonal depression is no joke. My new mantra for life now is to chill. Praise the nature and find pretty little corners in the city. Write poems. Paint, maybe. Seek positivity. Love. Be kind to self. No rush. Read books. Just flow.
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