You know what my problem is? I am too attached. I am too attached to my family which is not a bad thing but it can be fearful sometimes. Because you lose what you cling to. I am so afraid of losing them, I can't imagine my world without them. And though I should. I should think more practically. That someday, I'd be left alone, or I just could die tomorrow. What I have is now. And I can't depend on somebody or some stuff. I shouldn't get attached with objects- my smart phone for instance. Yeah and I still miss my ipod shuffle. Whatever, the point is, I shouldn't. I should just accept the fact that, I have to be on my own, I have to write my future myself, others can help but they're not gonna be here with me all the time. So what I have is Now. Whatever I am planning to do, I should do it now. There's no getting ready for it. You can't always be ready. Things don't just happen to you, You happen to them.
Hi B, Season is changing. The hard days are almost over. The city I live in has turned so beautiful, I get overwhelmed by the beauty. Tulips are in. Cherry blossoms are blossoming. Magnolia, Beautiful white flowers, name unknown to me. Taking a walk out feels like a celebration of life. It feels like I'm falling in love with the city. I remember when I first moved here 2 years ago, the excitement and the crippling anxiety of starting a new life from scratch. Now, after 2 years, I feel a warmth and love for the place. I don't know if I would feel the same when the winter comes though. Seasonal depression is no joke. My new mantra for life now is to chill. Praise the nature and find pretty little corners in the city. Write poems. Paint, maybe. Seek positivity. Love. Be kind to self. No rush. Read books. Just flow.
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