Skip to main content

confession #95

I don't know what's gotten into me nowadays, I am trying to follow a healthy lifestyle. I feel extra conscious about sleeping proper 6 hours at night, just to get rid of my dark circles. And I've gone ever so dramatic over cleansing and moisturizing my skin...If you'd searched my web history, you'd find a bunch of stuffs about lotion reviews.And yesterday, my mom got so crazy over me because I bathed around an hour in shivering cold.And now I have a tendency of cleansing and moisturizing my face every half an hour. okay this has gone too far. I should probably stop.

I guess I'm up for a change. This year has started so fast, as to me, I didn't see it coming. Nothing really feels anew. To bring out the new year spirit, I have decided to go for a change. Change of my routine, lifestyle, music taste and read more books than I usually read. I think a change is all I need right now. Because I went through some really chaotic situation past few weeks, I need a sober up.

Everyday is a strike now. No one literally cares about life-risk. I have model-tests every day, and I've to sacrifice my peaceful morning sleep and in a daily basis. Do you have any idea how hard it is to get up from bed these days? It seems like I am glued to bed, super-glued and nobody could ever free me from it.But that I have tests to give and my parents won't be much happy about me bunking tests before HSC, neither am I so I have to get up anyway. You don't have any idea how torturous it gets. I yawn like every half an hour the day, and at night I sleep like a pig. And in the afternoon I feel like going for a beauty sleep but these days I am extra conscious about not sleeping in wet hair.So this is my life right now.

Oh and have you already reached a conclusion on the fact that I'd stopped confessing about my McDreamy? Then you should probably rethink it because I've got one. And I don't blame you, I too had thought it was over, I'd gone numb about him. But today when I saw him in a hoodie and jeans, I kind of fell in reverse.Like all those feelings stroke back again, I still get flattered, jealous, confused and extremely shy when he's around.Let's not dig deep. I'm not in the mood for talking feelings that I had buried ages ago.
He didn't look his age today, at all. He looked as if he were a teenage boy. And his jeans fit him well. I absolutely fell in love with the hoodie he was wearing. *Typically me*. He was actually looking kinda cute. I never knew the word "cute" could really go with his looks,until today. 


No wonder why I am writing an essay-like blog post, I actually missed blogging. Everyday I have to study for tests, so I don't get much time to type all up. I have stat and accounting tomorrow, I should probably get going. I didn't study all day. *Typically me*.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

spring is almost here

Hi B,  Season is changing. The hard days are almost over.  The city I live in has turned so beautiful, I get overwhelmed by the beauty.  Tulips are in. Cherry blossoms are blossoming.  Magnolia, Beautiful white flowers, name unknown to me.  Taking a walk out feels like a celebration of life.  It feels like I'm falling in love with the city.  I remember when I first moved here 2 years ago, the excitement and the crippling anxiety of starting a new life from scratch. Now, after 2 years, I feel a warmth and love for the place.  I don't know if I would feel the same when the winter comes though. Seasonal depression is no joke.  My new mantra for life now is to chill.  Praise the nature and find pretty little corners in the city.  Write poems.  Paint, maybe.  Seek positivity.  Love. Be kind to self. No rush. Read books. Just flow.
Post a Comment
Read more

long distance again

 I came back from my trip. It was amazing 2 weeks of my life. Seeing him again after so long felt strange yet peaceful. I finally got to be in his arms again. 2 weeks flew by and now I am back home and back to work and normal hustle and bustle of life.  He got an extension offer and decided to stay for another 3 months. It is sad because he was supposed to be back next month. He asked me if he should take it and despite having my heart aching I supported him in the decision. It is not confirmed yet but he probably be staying another 3. Another 5 months of long distance. How am I going to survive the winter by myself? I don't know. Honestly, in my heart, I don't care about how much compensation he be getting. I miss him so much and this long distance thing is killing me inside. Today is Friday night and instead of cuddles and movie, I am home alone. No plans to look forward. No one to talk to. I am the loneliest girl on earth right now. He is probably sleeping and not picking u...
Post a Comment
Read more

winter together

 Dear B,  Sorry I've been so MIA. Here's the update you missed - My husband came back! He wasn't approved for those 3 months of extension. I've been getting enough cuddles and kisses to survive this winter.  Yes, winter is here. Never underestimate the Canadian winter. It's the worst. Everything is grey and dark. However, I am looking forward to going home in March. I'm so excited to see my friends again. Most importantly my parents and brother. It feels a strange kind of feeling. I am planning to 'visit' the place I was born and call home. It is definitely a new kind of feeling.  Things been okay. We are okay. I am glad to have him back.  We bought a new couch and a coffee table. It's still in back order and I'm impatiently waiting for them to arrive.  Can't believe only 4 days left to 2026. Time is flying so quick. Hope we talk again, B. I swear I missed you!
Post a Comment
Read more