Skip to main content

Confession #44


I’ve been through crazy days! Tell me how many days I’ve been away? 2 weeks or 3 maybe? And I have so much to say, I’ve been craving for confessions, suffocating and praying for this chance to sit behind my pc and type all out.
 So my sis got married on 19th September, I had ict exam the day after. Long story short. I’ve been through hell and back. I slept like 2 hours the day before exam and I had only 3 or 4 hours in the morning for exam preparation. So I am just hoping that I wouldn’t fail this time. My exam was not that bad either. I think I am gonna pass to a marginal line. J
First thing first. The wedding (AQTH)
I had parlor make up on and looked so weird. I don’t look so bad in the pictures though. And my sis, she looked one hell of a bride. Very much bridish. She had this pinned up hairstyle, wore magenta saree. The color suited her good. She looked really bright and pretty. And about the groom. He looked really young and cute. Both looked cute actually. They matched. I just pray, they have the brightest future ahead. And that their life be filled with all the happiness in the world. I love them both. And my zizu is not a pedophile for sure. I can tell. He’s all normal and smart. So excuse confession number 4 please! It’s proven wrong. He loves api more than anything now, there’s no doubt.
Now back to me. I was all covered with makeup, blow dried my hair and my orna pained me more than anything that time. It does not stay in the right place, like ever. I don’t have much boobs to show, still it looks tacky on me. That time, underneath that dress and that makeover I was just as simple and ordinary as I am. I was suffocating to get back to the place where I could be me, just myself, no makeup, me on pajamas. No people. So in that time in the wedding with everyone else in the crowd, I felt like a misfit again.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

spring is almost here

Hi B,  Season is changing. The hard days are almost over.  The city I live in has turned so beautiful, I get overwhelmed by the beauty.  Tulips are in. Cherry blossoms are blossoming.  Magnolia, Beautiful white flowers, name unknown to me.  Taking a walk out feels like a celebration of life.  It feels like I'm falling in love with the city.  I remember when I first moved here 2 years ago, the excitement and the crippling anxiety of starting a new life from scratch. Now, after 2 years, I feel a warmth and love for the place.  I don't know if I would feel the same when the winter comes though. Seasonal depression is no joke.  My new mantra for life now is to chill.  Praise the nature and find pretty little corners in the city.  Write poems.  Paint, maybe.  Seek positivity.  Love. Be kind to self. No rush. Read books. Just flow.
Post a Comment
Read more

long distance again

 I came back from my trip. It was amazing 2 weeks of my life. Seeing him again after so long felt strange yet peaceful. I finally got to be in his arms again. 2 weeks flew by and now I am back home and back to work and normal hustle and bustle of life.  He got an extension offer and decided to stay for another 3 months. It is sad because he was supposed to be back next month. He asked me if he should take it and despite having my heart aching I supported him in the decision. It is not confirmed yet but he probably be staying another 3. Another 5 months of long distance. How am I going to survive the winter by myself? I don't know. Honestly, in my heart, I don't care about how much compensation he be getting. I miss him so much and this long distance thing is killing me inside. Today is Friday night and instead of cuddles and movie, I am home alone. No plans to look forward. No one to talk to. I am the loneliest girl on earth right now. He is probably sleeping and not picking u...
Post a Comment
Read more

winter together

 Dear B,  Sorry I've been so MIA. Here's the update you missed - My husband came back! He wasn't approved for those 3 months of extension. I've been getting enough cuddles and kisses to survive this winter.  Yes, winter is here. Never underestimate the Canadian winter. It's the worst. Everything is grey and dark. However, I am looking forward to going home in March. I'm so excited to see my friends again. Most importantly my parents and brother. It feels a strange kind of feeling. I am planning to 'visit' the place I was born and call home. It is definitely a new kind of feeling.  Things been okay. We are okay. I am glad to have him back.  We bought a new couch and a coffee table. It's still in back order and I'm impatiently waiting for them to arrive.  Can't believe only 4 days left to 2026. Time is flying so quick. Hope we talk again, B. I swear I missed you!
Post a Comment
Read more