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I'd been watching commencement speech on youtube given by respective personalities like J.K Rowling, Ellen, Lisa Kudrow etc. I didn't know I had such patience to hear speeches, whatever. they actually weren't that boring. I mean they are celebrities, whatever they lay on the table, it'd interest us. But no, I did learn something from it. They didn't just happen to be great personalities, they had endured a lot behind the picture. J.K Rowling had to deal with hardship, so as Ellen when she lost her sitcom just because she declared herself as lesbian, Lisa had no intention to be an actress; she was at first working on a research with her father who was a headache specialist. What happened to them was, they have encountered both success and failure and confusion among their passions. Obviously they had struggled at that phase of life and eventually overcame it through their potentials.Now look how accomplished they are!
I like what Ellen said. It was somewhat like- don't try to imitate any one's life or don't let it affect what you choose or how you choose to live your life. Create your own path. Be you. And J.K Rowling, she said, imagination is magic. Don't confide in what you believe in or what you want to think. Because life is more complicated than that. Lisa's commencement speech was entertaining but she seemed completely opposite of her character Phoebie on friends. She seemed bright and well educated in person. She had a degree in Biology, what you think?   And I learned from her speech that- Look forward. Be thrilled to try new things. Listen to your inner self. Don't dwell on what you're gonna miss. And so on. Okay then I got bored so I ended up watching a documentary on Greek mythology which I left to half end because I got distracted by watching Pitch Perfect 2 in the midway after iftar.


Anyway, what I realized is that. It's okay to have no clear concept of what I am going to do with my life ahead, because it will unfold itself to me. I don't have any idea how much I am going to suffer or how much I will succeed and fail what I do know is that, I have this limited time in my hand, this could work as a miracle worker, however I shouldn't waste it daydreaming on what my life would look like in future because it possibly could turn out nothing like I picture.



Now. I am seriously annoyed with my sister. Why? Let me explain it to you. I am gonna be harsh and judgmental. I am going to criticize her when I myself, am entirely made of flaws. Okay first off- She is obsessed about shopping, I mean whenever she's here,or wherever all she says and thinks about is- buying new clothes. And her time, mostly what I saw, are spent on hanging out in restaurants, watching movies, planning hangouts, planning, planning, planning when to go out for shopping next. I can't believe I am saying this. But I literally am sick of her. Not personally, I just am little worried about her. She is not ready for any kind of jobs. She is not improving herself. She is done getting good grades in the finals which are only good if not average and I am just concerned how she's not doing anything but sleep, eat and shop. She has turned into someone, I never want to follow. Suddenly she has become the least attractive person to me and at times I don't like her attitude. She fakes a lot. Then again, at least she can fake confidence which I highly lack in. So maybe things are in favor for her. The economy is booming. She'll get a job, yeah. I shouldn't be worrying. She's a grown up, she'll figure things out.

I know. I haven't even passed HSC yet, and I am already making myself a huge deal. Yeah I shouldn't. I am not giving commencement or speech of any kind. I shouldn't actually judge my sis for how she lives her life. But I just feel so...detached from her. Like somewhere, my sister in her that I used to love so much, alienated. And I am not saying that to exaggerate our sisterhood that we share.This is my way of saying that- I genuinely miss her. I miss her so much. I miss the person in her, the person that always made me feel good, inspired me, always looked after me, always reminded me that I was pretty special. The person in her that accompanied me in the finest moments of my life. The person who never failed to give effective advises. The person in her who secured me from loneliness and from the people who wronged me. That person in her I miss.  








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