spring is almost here

 I have been binging on true crime stories these days. I always had a thing for it, like I would legit watch documentaries, see graphic images even though it sickened me to the core. Just knowing how the killings took place, and the detectives figuring all out, the suspense, the flipping discoveries, everything just kind of fascinates me. I do feel bad about the families who go through such trauma of losing their dear ones like that abnormal way, but the stories compel me with lot of emotions and shock and I get consumed in it. 

Today I was thinking that, I should put myself in a routine again. My sleeping cycle has been fucked. I was thinking that maybe I should start working out, like just basics to keep myself active. I oversleep nowadays and feel drown out...I also want to re-watch Dexter again. This was one of my most favorite tv show, I was in my late teens when I started watching it on TV, it was pretty graphic, and I didn't have a laptop so when I downloaded it, I had to watch it on family computer and back then I didn't have my privacy. Now I can actually watch it without hesitation.

I've felt really lonely last night. And started stalking him again. I have to get out of this habit of stalking people from my past. It is such a waste of time. Hence the decision of incorporating self-desciplin.

I finished a book on meditation, It was titled- When Things Fall Apart by Pema Chodron. It was good, I learned some spiritual wisdom. Though I am not gonna review it here. It was vast. And I kind of read it in an inconsistent way, so I don't remember much of its content. I highlighted some parts though.

I need another book. Let's see...

Right now I am not thinking too much about the future. And trying to live in the present and be grateful.