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Confession#67

They didn't go to the private today.
And I preferred not going too, because I didn't wanna show up alone without Ankan. Then I would have to go through a whole bunch of theories and lectures and maths without having someone to talk to by my side. Ankan didn't agree to go anyway. In fact, she was utterly surprised at me for; why I am always eager to go stat coaching. I told her that it's getting close to the finals; I am just keeping those maths in practice and so I need coaching but she didn't seem to care. She even, doubted on me that I am crushed on Stat sir. Oh tell about it!
I didn't let her doubting any further. Because I don't want anyone knowing that I have a crush on someone inappropriate to my age and mind. That he's no one but our subject-teacher.And if my friends knew about it, they'd make fun of it, whereas it's nothing to be made fun of. I am not just crushed on him. The feelings I have for him is beyond that term. I am fond of him. I would think of him everyday and daydream about us. Daydream that someday this whole universe would break into pieces bringing us together. I'm such a cheese, no?
Enough about him already. Let me describe you the day I had.
SO clearly, we bunked our privates and spent some retarded time in college. Only 4 days left for our college days to end so we wanted to make it memorable. We went to the field and burned our faces in the sun. UGH. Forgot to put sun-screen Again! Anyway, so we kind of played cricket, screamed in our laughter, played kanamachi, sweated like pigs and then sat in the common room, sang out some bengali classic songs and gossiped because that's what we do best. It was really fun, I wanted to stay long. Although I was missing my McDreamy the whole time. It's the private where I can see him wholeheartedly. I saw him in the morning at college but couldn't get enough of him. He's not even that hilarious at college, today he lectured about Sufia Kamal and almost described to us her whole biography in the half class-period. He said we're leaving college so soon that we wouldn't get the seminar so he just summarized what we'd be missing.
Yesterday at private I was feeling kind of hot and the fan was rotated to the other-side where he was sitting. So I kind of eyed at the fan and wondering if I could get some air. But then I was concentrated on my writing theories and within a sec I felt a wind brushing over me. I smiled. But my eyes were still at the paper. He asked me, "Now, okay?" I just nodded. I love how he cares for his students. He rotated the fan to my side, just because I felt hot. He didn't care about himself. That's when I knew completely and came to a realization that he's a very good man and with a very good heart.
And that I have fallen for his heart so bad. 

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