Everly

I'm eighteen and I still cry like a baby. I can't stop crying and dreaming. I just can't. I cry until I get what I want. I cry because of insecurities. I cry because there's a pain in my heart. A pain, not understandable why. what do I want?  I want snow. I want to be happy again. I want to laugh. I want to breath. well not like normal in and out type of breathing. A long deep breath. An escape from the town, far far away, in the green,cold weather.I wanna breath till my lungs get all soared up. I want to sleep like a baby. Not just lying in bed thinking and regretting about the choices I've made in the past...a sound, profound, peaceful couple hours of sleep. a sleep that is unbreakable in the midway. so that I can wake up fresh,cleaned.like a new born baby. I don't know how it started.But it's not ending. All those stupid little things that causing this pain are not going away. I'm crying over little things. but trust me it hurts like crazy. I fe...

I'm gonna be 18 pretty much soon. well, the day after tomorrow. Yeah.  17 years of My life. Honestly, I've got no idea how I've been doing so far. Should I be more active and mature at this point, or get serious about life?. I don't know. Everything seems so normal. Been realizing that my life's all about sleeping,eating,eating and eating.ugh. Yesterday was my last class of the 1st year of my college. I don't know how and why( not so good at physics lol.) time passes so fast.It's been like a year I had done with my ssc and now steppin up to the 2nd year of college which is crazy. I literally freaked out yesterday.seriously? It's been a year? Soon I'll be out of the college,will be pushed into some uni and career and all that. Then what? I'll be actually living my life. I'll make my own money. how crazy is that! at this point everything seems so dumb. I'm a girl of seventeen soon to be eighteen and I've got no story. no mystery...