Let me sugarcoat things for you.
My eyes cry enough. My heart gets tired but my eyes don't. I resent my parents now and then. I try to shout as loud as possible, as a last hope of them to understand what I've been feeling inside. But only in void. Because they don't know how badly I don't wanna live. How pointless everything is to me now.
I am on my semester break now. My father wakes me up every morning for breakfast. He has bitten me on days, I didn't want to wake up. I swallow whatever's on my plate and go back to sleep. My bed. Smells like depression. My bed is like a hug in the daylight, when I don't want to open my eyes. I don't want to remember who I am, what am I doing with my life. I sleep till my father wakes me up again. For lunch. I eat fast as I can and immediately go back to sleep. This is my life now. I am barely awake. Times I am awake, I watch something. And cry myself to sleep. There's nothing going on beyond that. Just nothing.
I decided to go on. Whatever life has it. I want to see how much this body can bear. How much my mind can convince what a waste of space I am. This year I have no resolution. I have given up.
I don't see myself fulfilling any of my dreams.
I'm just done.
My eyes cry enough. My heart gets tired but my eyes don't. I resent my parents now and then. I try to shout as loud as possible, as a last hope of them to understand what I've been feeling inside. But only in void. Because they don't know how badly I don't wanna live. How pointless everything is to me now.
I am on my semester break now. My father wakes me up every morning for breakfast. He has bitten me on days, I didn't want to wake up. I swallow whatever's on my plate and go back to sleep. My bed. Smells like depression. My bed is like a hug in the daylight, when I don't want to open my eyes. I don't want to remember who I am, what am I doing with my life. I sleep till my father wakes me up again. For lunch. I eat fast as I can and immediately go back to sleep. This is my life now. I am barely awake. Times I am awake, I watch something. And cry myself to sleep. There's nothing going on beyond that. Just nothing.
I decided to go on. Whatever life has it. I want to see how much this body can bear. How much my mind can convince what a waste of space I am. This year I have no resolution. I have given up.
I don't see myself fulfilling any of my dreams.
I'm just done.
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