Skip to main content
This week is gonna be brutal on me. One presentation, 2 quizzes, final term paper and home-work !!

Then Finals. The thing is this semester went off terribly fast and I have studied comparatively less. My determination was big, but attempt was poor and I wasted most of my time thinking about silly things. Making thought bubbles about things that actually won't matter at the end.

I was at Turtle Dove's house today. It was a house warming party. All girls. We had fun. I started to realize. These people now- has become a part of my life and no matter how badly I want to separate myself from them, I can't. I am literally stuck with T.  I can't abandon her. Mainly because, she has always looked out for me, shadowed me, since the first semester. And even if I hate to be with Meanie who is a good friend of T, I can't take separate courses...I can't distance myself from T.Our friendship has come to a point where, we are becoming used to it. And I don't want the hassle to do classes with people I don't know shit about. SO next semester, it is me, Turtle and Meanie again.

This week is enough pressure. I have to prepare for finals. I can't mess up my grades now. Have to ace it. So I am channeling my depression over singer guy to study. At least trying to.

Turns out, T too had a crush on him before. Secrets have been revealed today. Argh. Finally. I was like- is it only me who thinks this man is too hot to resist?

 From now on, I will treat myself like an angel. I have to improve. I simply can't just prioritize someone who doesn't give a fuck about me and looks down at me. I am trying to get over him. This is official. He has no business in my mind now.


 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

"Because nothing makes me happier and nothing makes me sadder than you.”

“If I had a camera," I said, "I'd take a picture of you every day. That way I'd remember how you looked every single day of your life." "I look exactly the same." "No, you don't. You're changing all the time. Every day a tiny bit. If I could, I'd keep a record of it all." "If you're so smart, how did I change today?" "You got a fraction of a millimeter taller, for one thing. Your hair grew a fraction of a millimeter longer. And your breasts grew a fraction of a—" "They did not!" "Yes, they did." "Did NOT." "Did too." "What else, you big pig?" "You got a little happier and also a little sadder." "Meaning they cancel out each other, leaving me exactly the same." "Not at all. The fact that you got a little happier today doesn't change the fact that you also become a little sadder. Every day you become a little more of both, which me...

v day

 I am in luteal phase and everything my husband doing is irritating me.  It is all scientific I know but still everything is so annoying and I just wanted pizza. He ordered biryani.  I wanted to go on a date on valentines day. He brought me flowers, which was sweet but he forgot to book the restaurant and we ended up going costco instead. I just feel like I am wasting my best years on him. Is it normal to feel like that. We are almost 2 years into our married life and I already miss our initial chemistry. I feel like we are being like an old married couple. It shouldn't feel like that, right? I mean, it is still new; we aren't that old yet.  I feel so bored honestly, and disappointed.  Again, this could be because of my luteal phase.  I am sad too.  I wish, he made a little more effort to make me feel special. Make me feel deserving. I wish I didn't dress up to do our groceries on Valentines day. 

opposite sides of a coin

Hi B,  I've been sort of busy with the training for the job and have another interview coming tomorrow. I am torn between staying with the current job and switching or keeping both as part times. I don't know, I guess I will have a decision made if the interview goes well. I have been traveling far for the current one and every time I get on the bus or the the train I feel depression kicking in full force. Suddenly I remember home, the comfort of being around my loved ones, the easy life I once had back in Bangladesh. Certainly, there are things that weren't easy but I guess it felt easy because I was more used to it. Transport was rickshaw and didn't even think twice before booking an uber because I always had some money with me. Now I have literally 200 dollars to go by and I have to think twice to even buy a cup of coffee or a piece of bread. I guess with time, I will be able to save up some money. I am glad at least I got to start working. It is still very overwhelm...