Skip to main content

world war?

 Dear B, 

I don't watch the news but there has been a lot of speculations on social media of a possible world war III. My sister just texted me that I should save up money as we don't know what that might do to the economy. It is ironic because I just ordered something online last night. Every time I go out, I spend. I don't even have a good paying job and I spend like I have full time.

However, one thing I learned from my past is that there is no point in stressing about the future. What I have control over is now. I can either live in the moment or ruin it by ruminating and what good will it bring to my life?

Living alone can get boring. However, I am trying to find things to do. Maybe I will visit a bookstore today. Lets see. 

I have rearranged the furnitures yesterday. Cleaned as well. The place looks good. 

Maybe I will go IKEA. I love it there. Even though I can't afford furnitures, I just enjoy looking at them.

Oh what to tell you B. My in-laws are coming this week to pay me a visit. I have been kind of stressing about what to cook for them. Have to do groceries too. It is a whole week of work. 

Update on adult friendships - no progress. The people I met, kind of drifting away. Due to life. Job. Lack of effort from their part. One of them is so flaky that I am tired of reaching out to her anymore.

I have accepted it and now I am moving and trying to hangout by myself. Enjoy my own company. Because life is too short to wait for someone to make time for you.

On the health aspect, I have been trying to incorporate some healthy juices in my diet. Unfortunately, my recent liver test was high. Well, I haven't made an appointment yet. I hope it is nothing serious. I have also started working out at home a bit. It is no heavy weights nothing. I am just focusing on moving my body more. My husband on the other hand is being serious with his workouts and almost daily shares all these exercises on instagram. It is a bit annoying. 

Yeah so that's a scoop of my life at the moment. I will write to you. 

I do feel comfort sharing my thoughts here. You are like this invisible friend in need. A safe space. A shoulder to lean on when I am literally the loneliest girl on planet. Thank you! Hug!






Comments

Popular posts from this blog

"Because nothing makes me happier and nothing makes me sadder than you.”

“If I had a camera," I said, "I'd take a picture of you every day. That way I'd remember how you looked every single day of your life." "I look exactly the same." "No, you don't. You're changing all the time. Every day a tiny bit. If I could, I'd keep a record of it all." "If you're so smart, how did I change today?" "You got a fraction of a millimeter taller, for one thing. Your hair grew a fraction of a millimeter longer. And your breasts grew a fraction of a—" "They did not!" "Yes, they did." "Did NOT." "Did too." "What else, you big pig?" "You got a little happier and also a little sadder." "Meaning they cancel out each other, leaving me exactly the same." "Not at all. The fact that you got a little happier today doesn't change the fact that you also become a little sadder. Every day you become a little more of both, which me...

v day

 I am in luteal phase and everything my husband doing is irritating me.  It is all scientific I know but still everything is so annoying and I just wanted pizza. He ordered biryani.  I wanted to go on a date on valentines day. He brought me flowers, which was sweet but he forgot to book the restaurant and we ended up going costco instead. I just feel like I am wasting my best years on him. Is it normal to feel like that. We are almost 2 years into our married life and I already miss our initial chemistry. I feel like we are being like an old married couple. It shouldn't feel like that, right? I mean, it is still new; we aren't that old yet.  I feel so bored honestly, and disappointed.  Again, this could be because of my luteal phase.  I am sad too.  I wish, he made a little more effort to make me feel special. Make me feel deserving. I wish I didn't dress up to do our groceries on Valentines day. 

opposite sides of a coin

Hi B,  I've been sort of busy with the training for the job and have another interview coming tomorrow. I am torn between staying with the current job and switching or keeping both as part times. I don't know, I guess I will have a decision made if the interview goes well. I have been traveling far for the current one and every time I get on the bus or the the train I feel depression kicking in full force. Suddenly I remember home, the comfort of being around my loved ones, the easy life I once had back in Bangladesh. Certainly, there are things that weren't easy but I guess it felt easy because I was more used to it. Transport was rickshaw and didn't even think twice before booking an uber because I always had some money with me. Now I have literally 200 dollars to go by and I have to think twice to even buy a cup of coffee or a piece of bread. I guess with time, I will be able to save up some money. I am glad at least I got to start working. It is still very overwhelm...