Skip to main content
New Semester!

I had Accounting and Marketing today, and I was never so focused in class! This semester break had me transformed into a sincere student, yeah.

I didn't go on that date with Demon, we never discussed it ever again. He sent me snaps for a day or two but I got scared and stopped hitting him with texts. I guess I am not ready, for a Date. I don't know if I'll ever be...I am so bad at conversations with guys...Literally...And the unknown scares me....I don't want to deal with a phase of awkwardness to have something going on in the name of an affair...I guess I am not ready for love yet. Not my cup of tea.

I think what is most attractive about a guy to me is the effort he makes. That shows he cares. And if he wants me, he takes action. I have met a fair amount of guys who were attracted by me but didn't do a single wretched thing about it. Actions speak more than words do. I don't know about other girls but this is me, and this is when I feel I am loved and feel the need to reciprocate.

I guess a part of me still wants Demon to not give up yet. If only he could show me he is bigger than his ego. Maybe I would've considered to meet him. My guts tell me, he is not worth it. I am following my guts. 










Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

"Because nothing makes me happier and nothing makes me sadder than you.”

“If I had a camera," I said, "I'd take a picture of you every day. That way I'd remember how you looked every single day of your life." "I look exactly the same." "No, you don't. You're changing all the time. Every day a tiny bit. If I could, I'd keep a record of it all." "If you're so smart, how did I change today?" "You got a fraction of a millimeter taller, for one thing. Your hair grew a fraction of a millimeter longer. And your breasts grew a fraction of a—" "They did not!" "Yes, they did." "Did NOT." "Did too." "What else, you big pig?" "You got a little happier and also a little sadder." "Meaning they cancel out each other, leaving me exactly the same." "Not at all. The fact that you got a little happier today doesn't change the fact that you also become a little sadder. Every day you become a little more of both, which me...
Post a Comment
Read more

v day

 I am in luteal phase and everything my husband doing is irritating me.  It is all scientific I know but still everything is so annoying and I just wanted pizza. He ordered biryani.  I wanted to go on a date on valentines day. He brought me flowers, which was sweet but he forgot to book the restaurant and we ended up going costco instead. I just feel like I am wasting my best years on him. Is it normal to feel like that. We are almost 2 years into our married life and I already miss our initial chemistry. I feel like we are being like an old married couple. It shouldn't feel like that, right? I mean, it is still new; we aren't that old yet.  I feel so bored honestly, and disappointed.  Again, this could be because of my luteal phase.  I am sad too.  I wish, he made a little more effort to make me feel special. Make me feel deserving. I wish I didn't dress up to do our groceries on Valentines day. 
Post a Comment
Read more

opposite sides of a coin

Hi B,  I've been sort of busy with the training for the job and have another interview coming tomorrow. I am torn between staying with the current job and switching or keeping both as part times. I don't know, I guess I will have a decision made if the interview goes well. I have been traveling far for the current one and every time I get on the bus or the the train I feel depression kicking in full force. Suddenly I remember home, the comfort of being around my loved ones, the easy life I once had back in Bangladesh. Certainly, there are things that weren't easy but I guess it felt easy because I was more used to it. Transport was rickshaw and didn't even think twice before booking an uber because I always had some money with me. Now I have literally 200 dollars to go by and I have to think twice to even buy a cup of coffee or a piece of bread. I guess with time, I will be able to save up some money. I am glad at least I got to start working. It is still very overwhelm...
Post a Comment
Read more